How to cope with loss

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When my clients lose a loved and treasured companion, they will often ask for some advice on how to cope.

What is the next step?

I will often answer that the most important first step is no step at all.

I suggest they simply sit down quietly, Turn the TV off. Grab a bit of paper, an old envelope, anything and scribble down their thoughts. Write it all down. No one else will see it. And if you don’t like writing, then draw a picture. Or record something onto your phone (voice memo).

Here’s a poem written by Ailsa’s loving owner / parent and shared on a local forum a few years ago:

I wrote this when we lost Ailsa, aka ‘Nellie-bear’ AILSA (29/09/01 – 22/08/11) ‚Äč

There’s a big empty space at the end of the bed
Where a Doberman once used to lay
And a worn patch of cloth on the black eiderdown
With the stitching beginning to fray
There’s her water bowl, collars and biscuits and treats
Her stuffed ‘kitten’ still on the floor
And the cats are subdued, treading softly about
Because Ailsa is with us no more
And this big empty space at the end of the bed
Is so hollow and lonely today
There is nothing on earth that could fill up the void
Where a Doberman once used to lay.

Sleep tight, Nellie Bear.

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